Yesterday I wrote about knowing so today I’m writing about not knowing. Not knowing can be frightening or exciting…it all depends upon your point of view and how you look at life. I am one of those people that doesn’t like being in the dark…literally or figuratively. I have too vivid of an imagination to be alone in a completely dark room. I imagine the worst things in the darkness and am filled with an overwhelming sense of dread. It’s not that different for me when there are things that I don’t know but want to know. Need to know. I don’t even like surprises. I am a need to know person. I am also very empathetic so I can usually sense when someone is holding something back from me or is being less than truthful. When I sense that, it makes me a bit anxious and sometimes angry. I have a very bad habit of checking to see what’s been purchased from my Amazon wishlist when my birthday or Christmas is near…like now. I love learning which is also a way of knowing. I want to know everything about everything. That, however, is not possible but I will continue to try. Sometimes it’s better not to know. Knowing certain things can hurt us, destroy us, screw with us, break us. But, sometimes knowing is best. It can uplift us, amaze us, inspire us, intrigue us, prepare us. Not knowing makes us curious. Sometimes that’s good and other times not so much. The difficult thing is that we have to make the choice between knowing and not knowing without being aware of the repercussions of our choice. We won’t find those out until after our choice is made. Like most things in life, it’s a crapshoot…one big gamble. But we have to take a leap of faith and live with our choices because that’s life which is just one big unknown.
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I like knowing too. Surprises to me mean secrets. Secrets are usually not good.
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