Day 124: Reaching Out

Last night, I was having a little trouble falling asleep so I was just looking through my iPhone and getting rid of some contacts that are no longer actually contacts.  And I came across one name that gave me pause.  Jay.  We have been friends since 1988.  He is my very best friend.  We have been through so much together…divorces, various relationships…we dated for a while but we are just too much alike for that to have ever worked out…, heartbreaks, career changes, 2nd marriages and a 3rd marriage for him, and so much more.  We bonded over books and a warped sense of humor at the wholesale produce company where we worked.  At that time, my life was in major transition and I was finally figuring out exactly who I was and what I was capable of in every area of my life.  It was an exciting and scary time.  Anyway, about 8 years ago, our lives totally diverged.  Jay moved to Alaska and then he was in the Philippines courting his now wife and mother of his son (that was born this weekend) that he was introduced to by her cousin and now back in Anchorage.  I was buried at work and wasn’t in the best place emotionally so we drifted apart…more my fault than his.  So, last night, I messaged and apologized for basically cutting him out of my life.  I wished him happiness.  Within 10 minutes, he had messaged me back and we were right back in our groove like no time had passed.  And the 3,000 miles don’t mean anything.  That’s what friendship is about.  And my tribe is growing.  I almost deleted Jay from my contacts last night but I just had to reach out.  That kind of bond doesn’t just go away.  Thankfully.  So, just a word of advice, before you completely walk away from someone that hasn’t done you harm…mentally, emotionally or physically…do yourself a favor and reach out 1 more time.  You never know where it might lead.


About Donna Heilman

I am a writer that lives in the Dallas-Ft. Worth Metroplex with my husband, 2 dogs, and 10 cats. I am currently working on my novel, Rapture, as well as writing poetry and some short non-fiction. I am honestly writing this blog to feel more connected with other creative people.
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2 Responses to Day 124: Reaching Out

  1. Maggie says:

    Great advice. Congratulations on your newfound old friend.


  2. This is wonderful advice. I love the way you qualified who you should reach out to. It makes such good sense.
    For Valentines Day I made a list of people I wanted to know that I think of them often. I figured it would mean 4 or 5 Valentines I would be making. Much to my shear delight I sent off 13 and have three more to make. Staying in connected should always be a priority.
    Thank you for the reminder.


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